That’s the question we get asked by almost everyone we come in contact with. And the honest answer is, it’s going.
Some days it’s going very smoothly. Some days it’s going like traffic on i4, stopped for a breakdown and then picking up speed shortly after. Some days are spent just praying for a restart.
But here’s the how behind the going…
I am a creature of habit and routine (some may call it control ). It’s how I survive and feel comfortable each and every day. We truly believe that babies thrive on routine. With each one of our littles we have tried our best to make their days look as similar and structured as possible. For example, “they” (whoever they are) say don’t bathe babies every night, but we do because we want that to be a sign to start winding down for bedtime. Mornings look very similar every day at our house, very little surprises or unexpected events. Sometimes the routine gets in the way of fun things like events that are later at night and social gatherings during nap time. BUT. It’s better to miss those fun things than to have a totally un-fun (my made up word) evening at home full of tantrums and scrambling because routine has been messed up.
Drew and I used to be spontaneous. I would say even with two we were still somewhat spontaneous. Find something fun, load up, leave. Now. There’s no possible way to be spontaneous. Packing the diaper bag alone takes basically a doctorate and a detailed blueprint to make sure everything is in its place and nothing is forgotten. Don’t even try to do this without coffee! Prepping bottles for the three littles is another big plan ahead task. There is nothing worse than a hungry baby, or two…or three, and the bottles are dirty and formula isn’t mixed/warmed or ready. Diapers, strategically placed around the house and counting/estimating how many are unpacked and how many are left in the box so as to not run out during those desperate times of blow outs. Only having two hands and 4 kids means transporting them anywhere is a process. So figuring out which stroller, carrier, car, car seats are needed based on which kids are coming and going has to happen. The nightly routine (see there’s that word again) after putting the four babies down is pack the bag, fill the bottles, clean the family room, put diapers everywhere they need to be, wash the pacis, load transportation. Morning routine is all about planning and being ready for nighttime. Pull out bath time items, fill the bottles, change the sheets if needed. So long spontaneity. See you in 18 years.
This is the biggest and most important factor of how it’s going. We have been GREATLY blessed with so many helping hands. We do have a night care nanny who comes four nights a week to help us with night time feedings. If you know anyone who is having multiples or has kids that are very close together this is HIGHLY recommended. Forgo giving them a baby swing for their shower and give them money toward hiring someone to help them so they can sleep!!!! Drew and I would not be where we are mentally and emotionally if we were also sleep deprived. That’s a fact. But aside from the night help, every day for at least an hour someone comes to snuggle the babies, feed one of the mouths that are requesting food, switch the laundry, pick up the groceries, etc. Without this support we would be drowning. For. Sure. Some of the smallest help has been the biggest help. We are so grateful and we will never be able to repay everyone for their time and efforts to keep us afloat. It has been the biggest blessing.
Sense of humor.
I mean, let’s be real. Raising one child isn’t all glitter and rainbows. So raising four. Under three. HA! There are moments you just have to laugh at yourself or at your poorly behaved child. When the babies are crying and you drop the freshly warmed bottle and it spills everywhere, after a possible slight slip of a curse word you just have to laugh. When your middle child is unable to function if you walk two feet away from her, you just laugh as you play peek a boo while going potty. When your oldest is eating dinner and is rocket launching strawberries across the room and watching them land on your light fabric couch, you just giggle at his creative ability to make a strawberry a rocket and then correct and clean up. When you’re exhausted and your washing bottles with your husband and can’t figure out how it’s already 10:30pm because you swear you looked at the clock 30 seconds ago and it was 8:15pm, you just laugh at the whirlwind of life you are living.
So. It’s going. That’s going to forever be my answer when someone asks. Because it’s always gonna go, just depends at what speed and efficiency.